creator:dungbeetle. a serious beetle lover and 3D animator by profession. crap_online is a posting place for the jolts of thoughts from dungbeetle's mind after being Long-Wind-ified and greatly elaborated.

Thursday, March 24, 2005

Tonite i write.

life is short, play more. but what if i live long enough to make it to the lonely late years when i cannot surf or practice aikido anymore?even littlenomad.com went back to work. Half insulted, half glad; half way up, half way down; half being fired, half resigned. everything's gotta move on.i should be the bottom of the pit of my emotions. I seem lost, yet i feel the long anticipated freedom getting nearer and nearer, freedom from this typical way of life, the social norm. am i breaking free from another chain and lock or is this just a short term deception i cast upon myself when i am in fact putting on more chains and locks to bound myself to what i am actually trying to run away from?
sugar-coatings off, i was summoned to the pantry by my boss and both of them stared at me with the kind of look you knew something wasnt right. so i asked "wat's up? and was asked to guess how come i was summoned. i knew what was coming so i just played dumb and smiled silly, i never hold my fake smiles for long, i never liked to, nor can i. they were polite, politely smiling while they popped the question at me: " would u think that our company dont really suit you?,in the sense that our directions are not parallel?" they smiled, " yeah, since you started this topic, i wont mind telling, i was actually planning to pass you my resignation by tomorrow" i said.(no i wasnt trying to save face or anything, i actually intended to) "i initially had thought about quiting the job after the BALI trip which is from21st of april till 1st of may, but it would be totally un-ethical to do so, so there were only two options left, " i continued," " iether work for another 2 or 3 months after my BALI trip before i hand the big letter in, which i see no point in doing so, since my heart is no longer pumping there,it's simply a waste of time for both parties. So That leaves me the ONLY option as to when my BIG day would be: BEFORE my BALI surf trip,which is this week"
From the look on their faces, i feel like they felt like they had a lice removed,a bug fixed, or even a cancer treated.it wouldnt be exactly what they really felt, but, Atleast this is how rotten i felt for atleast a mere Split-second, i was hit by the fact that i was, IN a WAY "fired" ,but Hey, i chose not to think it this way, atleast we are not wasting anymore of eachothers' lives! half fired, half resigned hahaha.
a question to the TAROT returned with a positive sign, KING of WANDS, my question was whether i could find a job that i like during the month of may?hell, my housemates who were deciphering the TAROT kept scratching theirheads cos i couldnt even name what does it mean to say "JOB THAT I LIKE?" but heck, it's a good card, and it says i WILL eventually find something that i like doing. and i'm supposed to have someone special to help me out. hmm~ i wonder.
people had be extremely helpful recently, i had a major breakdown ,my bug, right after i passed the KELANAJAYA station, my car's engine went out, and i could do nothing but let it glide prolly not less than 900metres away, to the nearby CALTEX station, which i had to push her, SOLO for another 80metres to a safe spot to park.as i'm practically a dummy on engines, i called Kash, the fellar who introduced me into ACOUSTIC ENGINE (vw club) and he came to the rescue after prolly an hour , along with 3 bugs, UMAI, abang RASHID and Kyle. they fixed my car, and it seems the problem is the rusty contact-point. thanks a million dudes.
Loongchai had contacted his boss to ask whether i could pay a visit to their shooting valley someday soon, and he told me to go next monday.awesome! i was thinking of venturing into this field, of film production or TVC production. no more sitting infront of pc's , i thought i might give a shot trying to deal with people, never try,never know. u know?
half free, half caged, still bounded by the regularities of life, norms of our society. what is right and what is not. what is considered a successful life, and what is defined as a wasted one? i wrote tonite, without cover or mask, i have only 2k in my bank account now, and my next paycheck will all go to my BALI trip, will i even survive for anothermonth? will my bug be able to have a new skin afterall?cos my gearbox is coming apart, and replacing it costs me another 1k.
looking for a young, nice and pretty SUGARMOMMY.

3 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I might have gone back to work but that is only i have no more money to see africa! =)

May 11, 2006 at 9:50 AM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This idea has become outdated

March 15, 2010 at 3:26 AM

 
Blogger يحي سامي said...

شركة تسليك مجاري بخميس مشيط

September 17, 2020 at 6:33 PM

 

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